Please Sit Down

Dear Lutz,

So this is a question about concert-going etiquette. We bought tickets to an alt-rock band (My Morning Jacket) -- these tickets were to particular seats, and good seats too (in the 5th row, on the side). The concert was in a very nice concert hall in Seattle where they have the opera, etc. Now as soon as the band came on, a number of people in the seats in front of us stood up, and then didn't sit down for most of the concert. This gave me two choices: one, to sit down and not see the show or, two, to stand as well. Now, I don't like standing during concerts. My legs get tired. And I wasn't wearing the proper shoes to stand for the entire show since I HAD PURCHASED TICKETS THAT INCLUDED A SEAT. And a very comfortable seat. Now the people standing were not dancing, they were just standing there bobbing their heads. They could bob their heads in their seats. And hear just fine too.

In any case I didn't feel like I could ask them to sit, because it was an entire group of people, but please let everyone know what the proper etiquette is for concerts where you buy tickets for seats. Is it okay to stand just because it's a concert?

Signed,
Please Sit Down

Dear Sit Down,

Let me begin by offering my sympathies to your feet. I know all too well what foot pain feels like and I am not taking this question lightly. I also am quite familiar with the experience of staring at a person’s back for hours at a time and I can’t say that I’ve grown fonder of backs because of it. Being short, even if someone is sitting down in front of me, out cold, they still could be blocking my view. Of course I’ve never woken the person up and asked him to move seats. But I would have liked to on many occasions.

But back to your question, and let me warn your right now that you’re not going to like my answer. If you were at a Lawrence Welk show, it would be safe to expect the audience to remain in their seats unless, say, one was trying to pop a bubble from the bubble machine or take part in a standing ovation after a particularly stirring polka. Since I’m on the subject of Lawrence, did you know that he never quite grasped English idioms? He was famous for his “Welk-isms,” like, “Now for my accordion solo, Myron, will you join me?"

But back to you. At an alternative rock concert, even of the slightly mellow variety, expecting people to sit the whole way through is just plain crazy. Not that you are crazy, but this particular line of thinking is, and if you keep thinking crazy thoughts eventually the label might stick. Here’s the thing: Bands like enthusiasm; they like an audience that seems into the show. I can guarantee, My Morning Jacket will put on a better show for a standing, head-bobbing, audience than a sitting, polite one. You can ask them yourself, if you like, but I’m 97 percent sure they’ll agree with me. (My Morning Jacket, feel free to confirm or deny.)

Right now would be a good time to mention that I am not now nor have I have ever been a rock star or an expert on rock stars. I don’t even know any personally. I hear they don’t make the best houseguests, so I’m not too broken up about that fact.

But since we’re currently running on the assumption that I’m correct, it’s reasonable to expect people to stand at a rock concert. And it does NOT matter that the venue sometimes has opera unless you mistakenly thought you were going to the opera, which would then explain your choice of footwear. In short, the answer is yes, it’s okay to stand at a concert. It’s expected, even if there is assigned seating. Next time you go to a concert, please wear comfortable footwear.

Since this is the first Ask Lutz column in many years, I thought it might be wise for me to explain my process: First I read the question. Then I read the question again and make sure I didn’t misunderstand anything the first time around. Then I put myself in the shoes of the person writing to me (so to speak—I tend not to purchase uncomfortable shoes). Then I try to consider any other perspective that might be involved. Then, if I need further education to make an informed response, I contact an expert. I understood your question right away, so I quickly moved on to the shoes part of it.

Once again, in answer to your question: You should wear comfortable shoes to a concert and expect to stand. Otherwise, the band might think you don’t like them and decide to look for another line of work. Oh, and I just thought of something else: Sometimes people stand instead of sitting to avoid getting blood clots. Next time you’re thinking about asking someone to sit down, think again.

Best wishes,
Lisa